Why Surrender Feels So Hard (And How It Changes Everything) | Mary DeMuth
Most of us aren't looking for another drink—we're looking for relief. Relief from the shame, the striving, the pressure, and the exhaustion of holding everything together. If you've been trying to stop drinking, break free from emotional numbing, or find real rest in Jesus, this conversation with author, speaker, and Pray Every Day host Mary DeMuth explores why surrender isn't losing control—it's where healing finally begins.
Christy and Mary discuss surrender, shame, control, emotional numbing, alcohol, and why God always pursues the root before He changes the behavior. Together they unpack why numbing—whether through alcohol, scrolling, binge-watching, overworking, or endless striving—never gives the peace we're searching for, and how daily surrender opens the door to lasting healing, freedom, and genuine rest.
If you've ever thought...
• "Why do I keep reaching for numbing instead of real rest?"
• "I want to stop drinking, but I'm scared of what will come up if I do."
• "I can't let go of the shame and regret from my past."
• "Why does surrender to God feel so difficult?"
• "Will I ever find peace without alcohol?"
Babe, this episode is for you. 🩷
Whether alcohol has become your coping mechanism or you're simply tired of carrying the weight of shame, control, and emotional exhaustion, this conversation offers a hopeful invitation into the kind of surrender that doesn't leave you empty—it leads you into the freedom, healing, and rest Jesus has been offering all along.
What You'll Learn
• Why emotional numbing never produces the rest your soul is searching for.
• The difference between numbing and true soul renewal through Christ.
• Why surrender is a daily practice—not a one-time decision.
• How control can quietly become its own addiction.
• Why God always heals the root before changing the behavior.
• How shame and regret keep women stuck—and how grace breaks the cycle.
• Why healing often happens in layers, not all at once.
• The role of safe community in lasting freedom from alcohol.
Resources Mentioned
📖 The Freedom of Surrender by Mary DeMuth
https://amzn.to/4sRvZnL
🎨 Download Mary's free Scripture artwork
https://marydemuth.com/surrender
✍️ Learn more about Mary's writer's intensive
https://marydemuth.com/intensive
Love Life Sober
🩷 Join the Love Life Sober Community
https://lovelifesober.co.uk/community
📖 Order Christy's book, Love Life Sober: A 40-Day Alcohol Fast to Rediscover Your Joy, Improve Your Health, and Renew Your Mind
https://lovelifesober.co.uk/book
Follow Love Life Sober on Instagram
@lovelifesoberwithchristy
Find Love Life Sober on Youtube
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
Christy found her true calling when she gave up alcohol and discovered a passion for helping women do the same. She has since coached hundreds of women across the US and UK as a highly trained senior sobriety coach, blending neuroscience, faith, and practical tools to help clients break free from alcohol and live with purpose.
She is the author of the best-selling Love Life Sober: A 40-Day Alcohol Fast to Rediscover Your Joy, Improve Your Health, and Renew Your Mind, and the host of the Love Life Sober podcast. Christy lives in Sussex, England, with her husband, their two teenagers, Ella and Carter, and their cavapoo, Copper.
You can discover more from Christy at
