Team Us: A Christian Marriage Podcast

We’ve all been a non-listener at times. Maybe it’s been the advice giver, the eternal optimist, the doomsayer, or the one who makes the conversation all about us. The truth is, we all fall into bad listening habits now and then. But here’s the good news: becoming a better listener is possible, and even small shifts can make a big difference in our marriages. WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE: The six types of non-listeners, and why we all slip into them sometimes Three practical ways to improve your listening: removing barriers, pausing before you respond, and showing real interest How better listening can deepen connection and help your spouse feel truly valued US TIME CHALLENGE This week, practice pausing for three seconds—or simply taking a breath—before you respond to your spouse. See how it changes the way you listen and connect. STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST If you enjoyed this episode, don’t forget to subscribe so you never miss what’s next. And we’d love to hear from you! What non-listener do you struggle with being? Share it with us on social media or contact us at AshleighSlater.com. LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE “The Five Types of Non-Listeners” by Allison Barron (https://www.boundless.org/blog/the-5-types-of-non-listeners/) There Is No Good Card for This: What to Say and Do When Life Is Scary, Awful, and Unfair to People You Love by Kelsey Crowe, Ph.D. and Emily McDowell (https://a.co/d/cSIRtxG) “Why Silence Makes Us So Uncomfortable” by Michele Leno, Ph.D. (https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/mind-matters/202502/why-are-we-so-uncomfortable-with-silence) “Breathe Before You Speak” by Richard Carlson (https://www.livinglifefully.com/flo/flobebreathebeforeyouspeak.htm) “5 Ways to Show You’re Really Listening” by Prepare/Enrich (https://www.prepare-enrich.com/blog/5-ways-to-show-youre-really-listening/) “6 Tools for Healthy Communication in Marriage” by Mike Bechtle (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/6-tools-for-healthy-communication-in-marriage/) Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Fall doesn’t have to be all about the big, once-a-year events like apple picking, Oktoberfest, or corn mazes that you choose to do together. It can also be about the smaller, weekly things that build connection, create memories, and give your marriage deeper meaning. In this episode of the Team Us podcast, we share why traditions matter in marriage, how some of the best ones start, and three simple steps you can use to create your own weekly fall traditions as a couple. WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE: The surprising history behind corn mazes and Oktoberfest Why Dr. John Gottman says traditions (or “rituals of connection”) matter for couples How even haphazard, accidental traditions can become meaningful when nurtured Three simple steps to create weekly fall traditions without feeling overwhelmed Practical ideas, from cozy movie nights to coffee shop dates, that you can start this week US TIME CHALLENGE This week, create one weekly fall tradition with your spouse. Use the three steps from today’s episode to get started and see how it adds connection and meaning to your week. STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST If you enjoyed this episode, don’t forget to subscribe so you never miss what’s next. And we’d love to hear from you! What weekly fall tradition will you try first? Share it with us on social media or send us a message at AshleighSlater.com. LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE “The Origin of 25 Fall Traditions” by Stacy Conradt (https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/86478/origins-25-fall-traditions) The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John M. Gottman, Ph.D., and Nan Silver (https://a.co/d/fWccp2c) “Traditions in Marriage: Setting a New Course” by Laura Schupp (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/traditions-in-marriage-setting-a-new-course/) All It Takes Is a Goal by John Acuff (https://a.co/d/3pBz0VC) Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

What happens when an early bird marries a night owl? Opposite sleep schedules can make even the strongest marriages feel a little out of sync. But here’s the good news: with a few intentional habits, couples can stay connected, whether one of you is most awake at sunrise and the other at midnight. WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE: Why going to bed at the same time matters (and how to make it happen) How to avoid “mismatched talk time” when one of you is chatty and the other isn’t Smart ways to protect quality time, even when energy levels peak at different hours Practical habits that help early birds and night owls thrive together US TIME CHALLENGE This week, pick one shared evening activity to enjoy together. It could be watching a show, playing cards, reading side by side, or taking a walk after dinner. The goal? Build a simple habit of connection, no matter what your schedules look like. STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST Want more encouragement and practical tools for your marriage? Sign up for our email newsletter at AshleighSlater.com to get fresh insights, resources, and updates on new episodes delivered straight to your inbox. LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE “Rise and shine: the daily routines of history’s most creative minds” by Oliver Burkeman (https://www.theguardian.com/science/2013/oct/05/daily-rituals-creative-minds-mason-currey) “Do you have a morning routine? Here’s how some historic figures started their day” by Parissa DJangi (https://www.nationalgeographic.com/history/article/morning-routine-history-marcus-aurelius-ben-franklin) “7 Things Night Owls Do that Morning People Will Never Understand” by Melanie Curtin (https://www.inc.com/melanie-curtin/7-things-night-owls-do-that-morning-people-will-never-understand.html) “12 Daily Routines of Famous People in History—And What You Should Take from Each” by Brianna Wiest (https://thoughtcatalog.com/brianna-wiest/2015/11/12-daily-routines-of-famous-people-in-history-and-what-you-should-take-from-each/) “17 people who prove you don’t have to be a morning person to be successful” by Rachel Gillett (https://www.businessinsider.com/successful-people-who-arent-morning-people-2016-10) “There Are 6 Human Chronotypes, Not Just Morning Larks And Night Owls, Study Says” by Peter Dockrill (https://www.sciencealert.com/scientists-say-there-are-6-human-chronotypes-not-just-morning-people-and-night-owls) “I’m a Night Owl Married to an Early Bird. Here’s How We Make It Work” by Adam Bulger (https://www.fatherly.com/life/night-owl-early-bird-couples-how-they-adpated) Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Life is full of change—new jobs, moves, kids growing up, health challenges. The question isn’t if change will happen, but how we’ll face it together. The good news? Change doesn’t have to push you apart. It can actually bring you closer. In this episode, we share 3 practical ways to not just handle change, but to embrace it as a couple. You’ll discover: How to reframe change as growth so it strengthens your relationship. Why it’s vital to create shared meaning together when seasons shift. The role of psychological flexibility in navigating the unexpected. “Us Time” Challenge: Talk through a recent change in your life. Then brainstorm a few intentional ways you can create shared meaning together in the middle of it. Stay Connected Beyond the Podcast Want more encouragement and practical tools for your marriage? Sign up for our email newsletter at AshleighSlater.com to get fresh insights, resources, and updates on new episodes delivered straight to your inbox. LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE “I Created a System to Make Sure My Husband and I Divide Household Duties Fairly. Here’s How It Works” by Eve Rodsky (https://time.com/5690007/divide-household-chores-fairly/) “Chores and Your Marriage” by Greg Smalley (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/chores-and-your-marriage/) “Divide and Conquer Household Duties for a Happier Marriage” by Suzanne Gosselin (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/marriage-success/divide-and-conquer-household-duties-for-a-happier-marriage/) “Survey: Most Hated Chores in the Home” by Cinch Home Services (https://www.cinchhomeservices.com/homeowners/blog/survey-most-hated-chores) Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Your marriage isn’t built on dishes and laundry, but how you handle them matters. What if splitting chores wasn’t just about being fair but about truly serving each other? In this episode, we share 3 simple ways to divide household responsibilities that make life at home smoother and strengthen your marriage. You’ll Learn: How to divide and conquer based on strengths Why volunteering for a dreaded chore shows love in action The power of covering for each other when life gets hectic “Us Time” Challenge: Take on a chore your spouse hates this week. Small sacrifice, big connection. RESOURCES & FREEBIES Free resource: Five Simple Marriage Tools You Should Know (com/5-simple-marriage-tools-you-should-know) Book: Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/) Freebie: Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/) LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE “I Created a System to Make Sure My Husband and I Divide Household Duties Fairly. Here’s How It Works” by Eve Rodsky (https://time.com/5690007/divide-household-chores-fairly/) “Chores and Your Marriage” by Greg Smalley (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/chores-and-your-marriage/) “Divide and Conquer Household Duties for a Happier Marriage” by Suzanne Gosselin (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/marriage-success/divide-and-conquer-household-duties-for-a-happier-marriage/) “Survey: Most Hated Chores in the Home” by Cinch Home Services (https://www.cinchhomeservices.com/homeowners/blog/survey-most-hated-chores) Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Did you know that 85% of affairs start at work, and one in five employees admit to being unfaithful with a coworker? In today’s episode, we’re not just talking about temptation, though. We’re talking about prevention. One of the best ways to protect your marriage is to build something meaningful inside it. We’re diving into three shared purposes that can shift your relationship from just managing life together to truly living it as a team. 3 SHARED PURPOSES TO HELP PROTECT YOUR MARRIAGE Grow more Christlike together Be dream-makers together Battle common enemies together TAKE THE “US TIME” CHALLENGE Set aside twenty minutes to ask each other this question: “What’s a dream—big or small—you’ve been holding onto lately?” Then just listen and hear each other’s heart. Be a dream-maker with your spouse, not a dream-taker. Or, if you want to start smaller, do the dishes or fold laundry together and make it a regular habit. CONNECT WITH US Sign up for our weekly email newsletter and get the FREE resource Five Simple Marriage Tools You Should Know here: ashleighslater.com/5-simple-marriage-tools-you-should-know/ TEAM US RESOURCES Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/) FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/) LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE “When Your Marriage Needs a Break” by Ashleigh Slater (https://www.huffpost.com/entry/when-your-marriage-needs_b_6866558) “85% of Affairs Start Here,” Front Row with Ken Coleman (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ttfD_a6QTY&ab_channel=FrontRowSeatwithKenColeman) “What Makes a Marriage Distinctly Christian?” by Bob Lepine (https://www.familylife.com/articles/topics/marriage/staying-married/growing-spiritually/what-makes-a-marriage-distinctively-christian/) “Dreaming Together in Marriage” by Erin Smalley (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/dreaming-together-in-marriage/) “How to Start Dreaming with Your Spouse Again” by Mark and Jill Savage (https://jillsavage.org/how-to-dream-with-spouse-again/) Every Marriage Can Get Better with Mark and Jill Savage {Episode 65} (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us-podcast-episode-65/) Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Is the kitchen a battleground in your marriage? In this episode, we’re dishing out three attitudes you can bring to the kitchen to turn tension over tacos into love over lasagna. If “I love you, but step away from the stove” sounds familiar, tune in to discover how to make shared cooking time a recipe for deeper intimacy. 3 ATTITUDES TO BRING TO THE KITCHEN Respect Curiosity Humility TAKE THE “US TIME” CHALLENGE Next time you cook together—or even just prep a quick lunch—try this: pick one of these three attitudes to intentionally practice. Whether it’s showing respect by biting your tongue, asking a curious question, or stepping back with humility, try it out. Then talk about how it went. CONNECT WITH US Sign up for our weekly email newsletter and get the FREE resource Five Simple Marriage Tools You Should Know here: ashleighslater.com/5-simple-marriage-tools-you-should-know/ TEAM US RESOURCES Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/) FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/) LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE Food Fights: I Love You, But I Hate Your Cooking {Episode 813} from Christopher Kimball’s Milk Street Radio (https://www.177milkstreet.com/radio/food-fights-i-love-you-but-i-hate-your-cooking) Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

The school year is back in full swing. If you're a parent, that probably means your calendar just got a whole lot crazier. In today’s episode, we’re tackling three common back-to-school stressors and sharing practical ways you and your spouse can turn chaos into calm. 3 BACK-TO-SCHOOL CHALLENGES COUPLES FACE Syncing family schedules Emotional exhaustion Parenting style conflicts PRACTICAL WAYS TO TURN CHAOS INTO CALM Have a calendar white board and daily check ins Give each other time alone for self-care and also take breaks together Stop, ask, and listen, and use the 49/51 percent rule TAKE THE “US TIME” CHALLENGE Talk with your spouse about what the top challenges are for you as we head into this new school year. Then, brainstorm some practical ways you can turn that chaos into calm as a team. CONNECT WITH US Sign up for our weekly email newsletter and get the FREE resource Five Simple Marriage Tools You Should Know here: ashleighslater.com/5-simple-marriage-tools-you-should-know/ TEAM US RESOURCES Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/) FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/) LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE “Kids reflect on the start of a new school year” by Ayesha Rascoe at NPR (https://www.npr.org/2024/09/08/nx-s1-5101763/kids-reflect-on-the-start-of-a-new-school-year) “How to Cope with Parental Burnout as a Couple” by Kristin and Todd Evans at Focus on the Family (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/parenting-stress-in-marriage-how-to-cope-as-a-couple/) “One Ritual You and Your Partner Need to Feel More Connected” by Aaron and April Jacob at Gottman Institute (https://www.gottman.com/blog/one-ritual-partner-need-feel-connected/) “How to Navigate Different Parenting Styles” by Kendra Han at Gottman Institute (https://www.gottman.com/blog/navigate-different-parenting-styles/) Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Within the Christian community, “Do not let the sun go down on your anger” is often quoted as a hard-and-fast rule for married couples to follow whenever they experience conflict. But sometimes Ted and I do go to bed mad—and surprisingly, it’s been good for our marriage. In today’s episode, we’ll tell you why. TAKE THE "US TIME" CHALLENGE Think of another hard-and-fast rule couples are often told. Do you practice it in your marriage? How has it been helpful? If not, what do you do instead and why? LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK Did you enjoy this episode? Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts! (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/team-us/id1565819107) TEAM US RESOURCES Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/) FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/) LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE Commentary on Ephesians 4:26 at BibleRef.com (https://www.bibleref.com/Ephesians/4/Ephesians-4-26.html) “The Benefits of Slumber” at NIH News in Health (https://newsinhealth.nih.gov/2013/04/benefits-slumber#) The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages by Shaunti Feldhahn (https://amzn.to/4dgY67T) Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

What’s the secret to a strong marriage? Listen in as we talk about the importance of consistent follow through in three specific areas. TAKE THE "US TIME" CHALLENGE Pick one idea from each of the areas to put into practice this week. LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK Did you enjoy this episode? Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts! (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/team-us/id1565819107) TEAM US RESOURCES Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/) FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/) LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE “Beating the Carnies: The Secrets to Winning 5 Popular State Fair Games,” Brett and Kate McCay, The Art of Manliness (https://www.artofmanliness.com/living/games-tricks/how-to-win-state-fair-games/) “The Ideal Praise-to-Criticism Ratio,” Jack Zenger and Joseph Folkman, Harvard Business Review (https://hbr.org/2013/03/the-ideal-praise-to-criticism) Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.