Your Hope-Filled Perspective with Dr. Michelle Bengtson podcast

077 How To Stop Comparing Yourself To Others

October 01, 2020
00:00 44:54
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Episode Summary:

In my 30 years in mental health, one of the most prevalent issues I’ve seen in my office has been not truly knowing our identity in Christ. So many look to others and their accomplishments, only to come up short and lacking in the joy Christ came to give us. Too often we spend our efforts trying to be better, and in the end, we just carry around a burden we were not meant to carry. In The Burden of Better, Heather Creekmore uses her characteristic humorous style to help us learn how a comparison-free life leads to joy, peace, and rest. She helps us understand how “the life of comparison is the old nature, not our new nature,” and then helps us see how living comparison-free lets us rest in the joy that is ready for our pursuing. If you’ve struggled with comparison, and constantly trying to be better (and who of us hasn’t?), then you’ve tuned in for the right episode. Today we’re going to be talking about how living a life striving to become “better” steals our joy, peace, and rest.

In today’s episode, we’re going to talk with Heather Creekmore, author of “The Burden of Better: How a Comparison Free Life Leads to Joy, Peace, and Rest”.

Quotables from the episode:

  • Too often we don’t realize it but we are enslaved to the “burden of better.”
  • Adam and Eve already had perfect, but Satan convinced them to sin so they could find “better.”
  • Slowly we turn our hearts away from the source of all that is good and toward the illusion of self-made satisfaction.
  • You can’t be fully present in the life God designed for you when you constantly wonder what life would be like if it were more like hers.
  • Comparison’s ladder has no top rung.
  • The concept of “better” is elusive.
  • Comparison can turn into a heart of envy.
  • Comparison is the opposite of contentment.
  • When I’m robbed of peace, joy, and contentment through comparison, I’m robbed of strength.
  • Comparison can become an idol. When we idealize, we idolize.
  • It’s not about you, it’s about me, we convince ourselves. Comparison is not a big deal, we reason. It’s necessary for my self-improvement. It doesn’t actually hurt anyone.
  • How close can we be to someone who we constantly size up
  • In comparing we add on to what God asked of us.
  • It doesn’t matter what you think of you. It only matters what God says of you.
  • If the enemy convinces us we are the only ones, he gets us isolated and powerless.
  • If we were perfect, we wouldn’t need a Savior.
  • Perfection keeps us trapped by arbitrary measures.
  • God’s sustaining grace comes in our suffering.
  • Suffering builds character and makes us more like Jesus.
  • Are you seeking to be better or are you seeking Jesus?
  • The first step in a comparison-free action plan is to practice gratitude.

Scripture References:

  • Hebrews 12:1-2 “Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God as set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith. Because of the joy awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne.”
  • Galatians 6:4-5 “Pay careful attention to your own work, for then you will get the satisfaction of a job well done, and you won’t need to compare yourself to anyone else. For we are each responsible for our own conduct.”
  • 1 Corinthians 15:10 “But whatever I am now, it is all because God poured out his special favor on me—and not without results. For I have worked harder than any of the other apostles; yet it was not I but God who was working through me by his grace.”

Recommended Resources:

Social Media Links for Host and Guest:

Connect with Heather Creekmore:

Website / Facebook / Instagram / Youtube

For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at:

Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails  /  Website  /  Blog  /  Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson)  /  LinkedIn  /  Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube / Podcast

Guest:

Originally an East Coast native, Heather is a pastor’s wife now living in Austin, Texas. Heather spent over a decade working in politics and marketing for non-profits before marriage and children. Now, through her own ministry, Heather speaks and writes to encourage Christian women who struggle with body image and comparison.  I love her byline that says “Stop comparing. Start Living.”

Her first book titled “Compared to Who? A Proven Path to Improve Your Body Image” helps people find new freedom from comparison struggles. In her free time, Heather homeschools four children, drives the soccer practice shuttle, makes sometimes edible freezer meals, competes on Netflix baking shows and breaks grammar rules. That’s why we’re friends!

Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson

Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson

 

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Meet Your Host
Dr. Michelle Bengtson is a hope concierge! She is a board-certified clinical neuropsychologist, international speaker, and award-winning author dedicated to offering hope, healing, and practical tools for mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being. As the host of the top-rated podcast Your Hope-Filled Perspective, she combines her professional expertise with biblical truth to empower listeners to overcome anxiety, depression, and life’s challenges through faith.

A trusted voice in Christian mental health, Dr. Bengtson is the bestselling author of Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor's Personal Journey through Depression and Breaking Anxiety's Grip. With over 30 years of clinical experience, she has helped countless individuals find lasting freedom from fear, stress, and discouragement.

Dr. Bengtson is a frequent media guest on platforms such as Focus on the Family, Life Today, and Moody Radio. Her writing and resources have been featured on outlets including Crosswalk, iBelieve, and Salem Media, equipping believers to embrace God's promises in every season.

Connect with Dr. Bengtson at DrMichelleBengtson.com, where she shares faith-based encouragement, expert insights, and free resources for cultivating a hope-filled life.
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