Could These 5 Unspoken Expectations Be Hurting Your Marriage?

March 31, 2026
00:00 39:16
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As a marriage coach, I know firsthand how unspoken and unrealistic expectations can quietly sabotage even the strongest marriages. In this episode, I'm sharing practical strategies to help you define, communicate, and realign your expectations so you and your spouse can avoid unnecessary disappointment and disconnection.

We'll talk about the five most common unrealistic expectations couples face, including the beliefs that our spouse should never change, should make us happy, or should simply know what we're thinking. I share some of my own personal stories—like how my expectation for Shaun to be the spiritual leader in our home led to unnecessary disappointment and what I learned about the roots of where that specific expectation came from.

You’ll learn how to:

  • Get curious together instead of assuming your way is the only way

  • Stay flexible and open to growth as both you and your spouse change

  • Collaborate and celebrate your unique strengths as a couple

  • Let go of the pressure to change each other

  • Develop a gratitude mindset for a more joyful marriage

Resources mentioned in this episode:

Get your copy of my new book, Tried and True: Marriage Advice from 12 Imperfect Biblical Couples

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Meet Your Host
Dana Che is the founder of Thrive Relationships, where she serves as a marriage and relationship coach and host of the Rebuilding Us marriage podcast. She also serves as a preaching pastor at her church. Whether in the church or on her podcast, Dana's mission is singular: to help people rebuild their relationships through the grace and guidance of the Lord.

On Rebuilding Us, she is known for her graceful candor, humor, and her encouraging yet challenging advice. Dana holds a B.A. in communication from Regent University. She has a fierce passion for fashion and a fiercer passion for truth. She shares her life with Shaun, her loving husband of over twenty-five years, their four amazing children, and their “multi-cultural” dog in beautiful Virginia Beach, VA.

Connect with Dana:
Instagram: @mrsdanache
Website: danache.com
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