Every Marital Argument Boils Down to these 5 Questions

May 12, 2026
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Ever wonder why you keep having the same fights about money, the kids, or even just feeling ignored? My guest, marriage therapist and Christian wives coach Beatriz Vargas says there are five core questions behind every argument in marriage.

Borrowing from renowned attachment-theory expert Sue Johnson's model, these questions can transform even the most hopeless-feeling, disconnected relationships. Beatriz explains how knowing these questions beforehand is a game-changer, and she also shares her powerful personal story of walking through marital struggle, separation, and ultimately, restoration.

Beatriz and I break down how every marital conflict, big or small, boils down to one of five foundational questions every spouse is asking—often without even realizing it.

We’re talking:

  • Why feeling valued, needed, and cherished is non-negotiable for a healthy marriage

  • How to recognize and break free from the “roommate syndrome” so many couples fall into

  • The role of prayer and honest self-reflection when things seem hopeless

  • How over-spiritualizing can sometimes get us stuck—and what healthy vulnerability looks like instead

  • Practical ways to talk through arguments and change the narrative in your relationship

Whether you’re the wife who feels like she’s carrying it all, or the spouse worried that you’re growing further apart, this conversation is for you. Beatriz Vargas even shares exactly where you can download the five core questions to bring these breakthrough conversations to your own marriage.

If you’re ready for real talk with real hope for rebuilding trust, connection, and love—even when it feels impossible—press play now!

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Meet Your Host
Dana Che is a speaker, marriage coach, and the host of the Rebuilding US podcast, where she helps people uncomplicate relationships and build deeper connections. She also serves as a Teaching Pastor at a multi-site, multi-ethnic church in Virginia Beach, VA. Dana is known for her graceful candor, humor, and encouraging commitment to the truth.

Dana holds a B.A. in communication from Regent University and is a seminary student at Fuller Theological Seminary. She has a fierce passion for fashion and loves all things beachy. She shares her life with Shaun, her childhood sweetheart and husband of twenty-seven years and their four amazing children in beautiful Virginia Beach, VA.

Connect with Dana:
Instagram: @mrsdanache
Website: danache.com
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