Q & A: My Spouse's Hygiene Habits Are a Huge Turnoff!

April 25, 2025
00:00 09:12
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We're tackling a sensitive yet common issue in some marriages: what to do when your spouse’s hygiene (or lack thereof) is causing tension in your relationship. A listener wants to know how to respond without hurting their partner or furthering the disconnect.

Key Takeaways:

  • It’s Not Uncommon: Hygiene issues are not as uncommon as one might think. Yet they can be a dealbreaker for many couples when it comes to physical closeness.

  • Direct but Kind Communication: Be honest yet gentle. Approach the conversation with love—focus on how hygiene affects the closeness in your marriage rather than making accusations or using harsh language.

  • The "We Over Me" Approach: Frame the issue as a shared problem impacting both spouses, not just a complaint from one person.

  • Gift What You Want: Subtle actions like buying body wash, cologne, or tissues can serve as positive hints for change.

  • Set Clear Boundaries: Define what you need (e.g., brushing teeth before kissing) and stick to those boundaries for your well-being.

Resources:

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Meet Your Host
Dana Che is a speaker, marriage coach, and the host of the Rebuilding US podcast, where she helps people uncomplicate relationships and build deeper connections. She also serves as a Teaching Pastor at a multi-site, multi-ethnic church in Virginia Beach, VA. Dana is known for her graceful candor, humor, and encouraging commitment to the truth.

Dana holds a B.A. in communication from Regent University and is a seminary student at Fuller Theological Seminary. She has a fierce passion for fashion and loves all things beachy. She shares her life with Shaun, her childhood sweetheart and husband of twenty-seven years and their four amazing children in beautiful Virginia Beach, VA.

Connect with Dana:
Instagram: @mrsdanache
Website: danache.com
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