Why Did This Happen? (Healing After Infidelity)

March 11, 2025
00:00 27:37
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One of the questions every betrayed spouse grapples with when dealing with infidelity is, "Why did this happen?" Infidelity can be one of the most challenging obstacles a marriage may face. Understanding the 'why' is crucial because every affair has a reason. It’s essential here to distinguish between a reason and an excuse. While reasons offer insights into underlying issues, excuses deflect responsibility. The truth is infidelity is always a choice, a willful decision, in nearly every case.

This episode outlines five reasons that commonly underlie affairs, including:

  • emotional disconnection
  • unresolved personal issues
  • lack of boundaries
  • unmet needs
  • personal crises.

It’s important to note that while these reasons might explain why an affair happened, they don't excuse the betrayal.

We also discuss “What now” after an affair has happened. If you find yourself in the unfortunate situation of infidelity, there is hope and healing is possible whether you stay in or leave your marriage.

Resources Mentioned in this Episode:

Reeling from Infidelity? Get my “Affair Recovery Checklist” and take the first next steps toward healing.

Ep. 49 - 5 Boundaries Every Marriage Needs

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Meet Your Host
Dana Che is a speaker, marriage coach, and the host of the Rebuilding US podcast, where she helps people uncomplicate relationships and build deeper connections. She also serves as a Teaching Pastor at a multi-site, multi-ethnic church in Virginia Beach, VA. Dana is known for her graceful candor, humor, and encouraging commitment to the truth.

Dana holds a B.A. in communication from Regent University and is a seminary student at Fuller Theological Seminary. She has a fierce passion for fashion and loves all things beachy. She shares her life with Shaun, her childhood sweetheart and husband of twenty-seven years and their four amazing children in beautiful Virginia Beach, VA.

Connect with Dana:
Instagram: @mrsdanache
Website: danache.com
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