Team Us
Listen on Your Favorite App

How to Embrace Conflict in Your Marriage as an Adventure, Not a Threat

May 25, 2021
00:00 27:08
Listen on Your Favorite App

Bilbo Baggins once referred to adventures as “nasty disturbing comfortable things that make you late for dinner.” In some ways, he’s right. Adventures aren’t simply exciting, thrill-seeking activities. They stretch us in ways that force us to change.

What does this have to do with conflict in marriage? Conflict is often uncomfortable and inconvenient. It disturbs our status quo and can even disrupt dinner plans…or gasp!…date nights. We often react like Bilbo and think, “Sorry, I don’t want any conflict, thank you. Not today.”

But it’s important that we work through conflict in healthy, team-building ways. When we choose to put our marriage’s long-term health and mission ahead of our individual agendas, it’s well worth the effort. Not only are we strengthening and deepening our relationship, but we’re also ultimately choosing to reflect Christ.

Listen in as we talk about conflict as an adventure, how to face your disagreements with a team-first perspective, and why your timing in resolving issues matters.

Strategies for Facing Conflict as a Team
1. Embrace conflict as an adventure
2. Trade a me-first perspective for a team-first perspective
3. Choose carefully how and when to work through conflict

Us Time Challenge
Think back to when you went on an adventure together. Talk about what was hard, but how you worked together to overcome the challenges. Discuss how that brought you together. Then talk about how you can apply some of the things you did to how you face conflict now.

Team Us Resources:
Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage
FREE Team Us Study Guide

Links Mentioned in This Episode: The Hobbit

Connect with Ted and Ashleigh:
Website | Instagram | Facebook

Discover more Christian podcasts at and inquire about advertising opportunities at

More Episodes
See all episodes
Meet Your Host
Meet Your Host
Ted and Ashleigh first met in Chesapeake, Virginia in 2001. In December 2002, they said, “I do, of course!” Since then, they’ve lived in five more states and celebrated the births of four daughters. Both have master’s degrees in Communication from Regent University, and over the years they’ve served as premarital mentors for engaged couples.

Ted’s a website developer, and Ashleigh is the author of the books Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment and Cooperation in Marriageand Braving Sorrow Together: The Transformative Power of Faith and Community When Life Is Hard.

Ashleigh has also written for publications including, Focus on the Family Magazine,, and HuffPost.

Learn more at
Podcasts About Us Contact Us Newsletters