The Four Steps That Saved Our Marriage with Ron and Nan Deal

February 09, 2026
00:00 42:16
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Struggling to break free from the same old conflicts in your relationship?

When Ron and Nan Deal suffered the devastating loss of their child, their marriage could have collapsed. For decades, Ron and Nan were stuck in destructive cycles, experiencing ruptures without repair. They sought help from Dr. Terry and Sharon Hargrave whose transformational Restoration Therapy has helped millions.

Now for the first time, Ron and Nan share their journey from a marriage on the brink of collapse to complete transformation. It happened for them and it can happen for you. Their new book is "The Mindful Marriage: Create Your Best Relationship Through Understanding and Managing Yourself."

On today's episode, they open up about how they kept repeating negative patterns—despite loving God and each other—until they learned to manage themselves rather than trying to fix each other. Let's listen in as Ron and Nan give practical tools to find peace through humility and Biblical truth.

02:42 The crisis point: when their marriage was coming apart

06:21 Ruptures vs. repair in relationships

09:12 Am I "dysregulated"?

13:09 The shift from fixing your spouse to fixing yourself

18:56 How seeking help and humility can change everything

21:23 These four steps transformed our marriage

30:14 Why saying the steps out loud is critical

33:36 What to do when past trauma gets triggered

37:12 Surviving amidst devastating loss: The story of losing their son Connor

Stay connected with Ron and Nan Deal and their ministries at rondeal.org.

More Resources from Arlene Pellicane:

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Meet Your Host
Arlene Pellicane is a speaker, host of the Happy Home Podcast, and author of several books including Parents Rising, Making Marriage Easier and Screen Kids.

Arlene has been featured on the Today Show, Fox & Friends, the Wall Street Journal, FamilyLife Today, Focus on the Family, and is the spokesperson for National Marriage Week. Arlene and her husband James have three children and live in San Diego. They have raised their kids without social media, video games and smartphones and inspire others to scroll less and live more. To learn more, visit her website at ArlenePellicane.com.
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